How is an inconsiderate husband defined?
-One who wins a trip to Disneyland and never takes his wife with him.
How does a man help with the household chores?
- By lifting his legs while you vacuum and placing the newspaper in the right place.
What’s 50-50 relationship for men?
- Women cook, men eat; women, clean, men throw their [...]

Continue reading " A 50-50 Relationship "

A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed
home.
He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed:
“Dear Lord: I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife
merely stays at home. I want her to know what I go through, so [...]

Continue reading " Sick and Tired "

A young man lives in the future
An old man lives in the past.
For youth, it’s moving too slowly
For age, it’s moving too fast.
A young man dreams of the gladness
The years just before him will bring;
An old man dreams of his pleasures
When life held the magic of spring.
But youth and age are in error!
The present [...]

Continue reading " Today is the Time To be Happy "

The first step in the search for truth is humility;
the second is humility; the third is humility.
Unless all other virtues are preceded,
accompanied and followed by humility,
pride will have its way in
and will destroy our good endeavours.

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A Japanese tourist went to the Philippines for some sightseeing. He hailed a taxi and asked the driver to take him to the hotel. On the way he saw a Honda City pass by. “Honda very fast!” he yelled, “made in Japan!”
A little while later he saw a Mitsubishi Adventure speed by. “Ah, Mitsubishi!” he [...]

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A husband’s credit card is stolen but he doesn’t want to report it—
the thief was spending less money than his wife!

Continue reading " Fortunate Thief "

One week ago I saw Amy, an old girlfriend, at the store. Twenty some years ago I fixed her up with my best friend, Crazy Harry. They were married and had two great kids. Harry was the best man at my wedding. I have known him since I was 13 and until I was married [...]

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When you are down to nothing …

God is up to something.

“Never frown, even when you are sad,

because you never know who is

falling in love with your smile. “

Continue reading " Believe in Something "

Do you know the relationship between two eyes? They blink together, they move together, they cry together, they see things together and they sleep together BUT THEY NEVER SEE EACH OTHER.
That’s what’s friendship is!
If I called you and asked you to pick me up because something happened…
Would you come?….
If I had one day left to [...]

Continue reading " Never See Each Other "

A friend of mine opened his wife’s underwear drawer and picked up a silk paper wrapped package:
“This, – he said – isn’t any ordinary package.”
He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box.
“She got this the first time we went to New York, 8 or 9 years ago. She has [...]

Continue reading " Take Hold of Every Moment "

FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.
FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs
REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM
FAKE FRIENDS: Never seen you cry.
REAL FRIENDS: Cry with you
FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
REAL FRIENDS: Keep your shirt so long they forget its yours.
FAKE [...]

Continue reading " Fake and Real…. "

1. A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest. A real friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself and doesn’t feel even the least bit weird shutting your ‘beer/Pepsi drawer’ with her/his foot!
2. A simple friend has never seen you cry. A real friend shoulder is soggy from your tears…
3. A simple friend doesn’t [...]

Continue reading " Real Friend Test! "