To my darling husband,
Before you return from your business trip
I just want to let you know about the
Small accident I had with the pick up truck when I turned into the driveway.
Fortunately not too bad and I really didn’t get hurt, so please don’t worry too
Much about me.
I was coming home from [...]
Funny's archives
Email from Loving Wife…
The Chuck Norris Internet Phenomenon
Appearing online since early 2005, Chuck Norris facts, factoids and quotations on Chuck Norris just wouldn’t die. In fact it is growing and gaining new and younger following thanks to numerous websites and stores spreading Chuck Norris quotes and funny lines- it has entered into popular culture.
The facts are mostly funny if not silly hyperbolic [...]
What Makes 100%? Do the Math.
From a strictly mathematical viewpoint . . . . .
What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever
wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We
have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over
100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in [...]
Tags: alphabet, asskissing, attitude, bullshit, formula, hardwork, knowledge, letters, Life, math, numbers, satire, Work
Priceless… A Post Christmas Story
There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses.
One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God with no actual address. He thought he should open it to see what it was about.
The letter read:
Dear God,
I am an 83 [...]
Judge Not!
I was shocked, confused, bewildered
as I entered Heaven’s door,
Not by the beauty of it all,
nor the lights or its decor.
But it was the folks in Heaven
who made me sputter and gasp–
the thieves, the liars, the sinners,
the alcoholics and the trash.
There stood the kid from seventh grade
who swiped my [...]
‘Dementia’ Questions (Just for laughs!)
A quick quiz to reassure you you’re still with it. Enjoy!
Dementia Quiz
Below are four (4) questions and a Bonus question to test your perception, reasoning and the quickness of your logical processing.
They are stated simply so you should try to answer them instantly.
To assure the accuracy of the results, you should not [...]
Continue reading " ‘Dementia’ Questions (Just for laughs!) "
Tags: arithmetic, Dementia, Funny, logic, math, perception, Q&A, questions, quiz, race, reasoning, think
Married Life
A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands.
On their wedding night, she told her new husband to ‘Please be gentle; I’m still a virgin’.
‘What?’ said the puzzled groom.
‘How can that be possible if you’ve been married ten times.?’
‘Well, husband#1 was a Sales Representative; he just kept telling me how great [...]
The Patch (it just might work)
The other day, I needed to go to the emergency room.
Not wanting to sit there for 4 hours, I put on my old Army fatigues and stuck a patch onto the front of my shirt that I had downloaded off the Internet.
When I went into the E.R., I noticed that 3/4 of the people got [...]
Tags: badge, DMV, for quicker service, Funny, Laundromat, patch, US border patrol
YouTube Viral: Jill and Kevin’s Big Day (JK Wedding Entrance Dance)
“Our wedding entrance dance to Forever…yeah, forever. It took place at a Church in Saint Paul, Minnesota.”
- The Kheinz
Continue reading " YouTube Viral: Jill and Kevin’s Big Day (JK Wedding Entrance Dance) "
Embarrassing Medical Moments
1. A man comes into the ER and yells, ‘My wife’s going to have her baby in the cab!’ I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady’s dress, and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly, I noticed that there were several cabs — and I was in the wrong [...]
‘O Fortuna’ by Carl Orff Misheard Lyrics
There have been many intentional mangled versions of this song “O Fortuna” by Carl Orff. This is among the funniest.
FROM WIKI: O Fortuna is a poem from Carmina Burana, a collection of Latin poems written in early 13th century. Fortuna is the goddess of fortune in Roman Mythology. German composer Carl Orff selected 24 poems [...]
Continue reading " ‘O Fortuna’ by Carl Orff Misheard Lyrics "
Plumber with a sense of (toilet) humor…
Gotta love this guy!
Continue reading " Plumber with a sense of (toilet) humor… "
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