One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God with no actual address. He thought he should open it to see what it was about.

The letter read:

Dear God,

I am an 83 year old widow, living on a very small pension.

Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had $100 in it, which was all the money I had until my next pension payment.

Next Sunday is Christmas, and I had invited two of my friends over for dinner. Without that money, I have nothing to buy food with, have no family to turn to, and you are my only hope… Can you please help me?

Sincerely, Edna

The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to all the other workers. Each one dug into his or her wallet and came up with a few dollars.

By the time he made the rounds, he had collected $96, which they put into an envelope and sent to the woman.

The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Edna and the dinner she would be able to share with her friends.

Christmas came and went.

A few days later, another letter came from the same old lady to God.

All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened.

It read:

Dear God,

How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me?

Because of your gift of love, I was able to fix a glorious dinner for my friends. We had a very nice day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift.

By the way, there was $4 missing.

I think it might have been those bastards at the post office.

Sincerely, Edna

A father passing by his son’s bedroom, was astonished to see that the bed was nicely made, and everything was picked up and tidy. Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was
addressed, “DAD”.

With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands.

Dear Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing to you. I had to
elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with
Mum and you.

I’ve been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I
knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercings,
tattoos, her tight motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older
than I am.

But it’s not only the passion, Dad . She’s pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns an old caravan in the
woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a
dream of having many more children!

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn’t really hurt
anyone. We’ll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with the
other nice people in the commune, for all the cocaine and ecstasy we
want.

In the meantime, we’ll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so
Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!

Don’t worry Dad , I’m 15, and I know how to take care of myself.
Someday, I’m sure we’ll be back to visit, so you can get to know your
many grandchildren!

Love,
Your son, Joshua.

P.S. Dad , none of the above is really true. I’m over at Jason’s house.
I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than
the school report that’s on the kitchen table.

Call when it is safe for me to come home!